escape from limbo

 During a video chat with Human Who Knows Me Uncomfortably Well.

HWKMUW: Dude, your hair looks fucking crazy.
Me (examining myself in the iPhone screen): It really does, huh.
HWKMUW: How long has it been since you took a shower?
Me: What? I dunno. Not that long?
HWKMUW: You’re lying. You’re only showering once a week, aren’t you. Before your mom’s performance, so you can leave the house.
Me: That… is true.
HWKMUW: Maaaaaa-yaaaaa.
Me: What? It’s not like I’m that dirty. I don’t do anything to actually get dirty.
HWKMUW: What I can see of your hair begs to differ.
Me: Shut up.
HWKMUW: It feels really good to shower. You should go shower right now. Think about it. All that water, washing away the crazy.
Me: Shut up.
HWKMUW: It’ll feel really good.
Me: Shut up. I want out of this relationship.
HWKMUW: If it helps, think of being clean as a kind of rebellion.
Rebel against the garbage nightmare, West.
Me: I’m not good at tricking myself. Not on purpose.
HWKMUW: How much longer until these applications are due?
Me: I don’t want to talk about it. But listen, I washed my sheets. Yesterday. That’s good, right?
HWKMUW (sincere): That is good! Congratulations! Seriously!!
Me: …I didn’t put them back on the bed, though. They were dry, but I couldn’t deal with putting them back on, so I just slept on the bare mattress. For four hours. From one p.m. to five p.m.
HWKMUW: That’s okay, that’s okay. It’s still good. That just needs to happen sometimes. Sometimes it’s just too much, and one must sleep fucked-up hours on a bare mattress.
Me: Truer words, friend. Truer words.